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Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Thu Jan 12, 2017 11:21 am
by Ilovesteptoe
My wife said to me once: Darling, have you ever wanted to be more adventurous with our sex life? I replied back: What do you mean adventurous? Wife: Well, let's do something more exciting. Make love to me when I least expect it. Me: Okay. You've asked for it, but before we do, let's move your mother's coffin, then do it in that hole. :shock:

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 7:19 pm
by Ilovesteptoe
My mother said: Pubert, when you grow up you'll be able to have relations with girls. I said: What, you mean have dad join in? :?

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Sat Aug 12, 2017 6:56 pm
by Ilovesteptoe
Donald Trump. Nuff said. 8)

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2018 5:10 pm
by Dirty Old Yank
"...I once worked a mafia club that was so tough, the specialty was broken leg of lamb."
--Rodney Dangerfield

"...This guy was so tough, for six months after he died the bartenders didn't steal in case it was a trick."
--Lenny Bruce

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 1:43 pm
by Uncle Nobby
Ivor Biggun wrote:
Can we say John Thomas?
Sun Jul 08, 2012 7:50 pm P3,

Or to misquote a Goons character, can we say Hugh Jampton?

https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/get-on-my-wick.html

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2018 9:37 am
by Dirty Old Yank
Ilovesteptoe wrote:Donald Trump. Nuff said. 8)

Have you heard? Aforesaid billionaire went to a mind reader...
...she only charged him half price :roll:.

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2018 1:22 pm
by Dirty Old Yank
“Years ago my wife and I made a deal, we only smoke after sex. I got the same pack now since 1975.
What troubles me is my wife, she’s up to 3 packs a day. The other night in front of my house I saw
a guy jogging naked, I said to him how come? He said because you came home early. I got no sex
life, a girl saw me naked and asked if there's a finder's fee. My wife can’t cook, are you kidding?
In my house, you pray after we eat. My kids are no help either......the other day I told my kid
someday you’ll have children of your own, he said so will you. I got a strange doctor, I told
him every day I wake up look in the mirror and want to throw up, what’s wrong with me?
He said I don’t know but your eyesight is perfect! He didn’t help me lose weight either,
he told me to run five miles a day for two weeks. I called him up and said doc, I’m 70
miles from my house." ---Rodney Dangerfield.

Re: Jokes (bad or otherwise)...

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2018 2:14 pm
by snodge
My doctor told me i need to exercise to keep fit... he said that anything that makes me breathless for 20 mins each day will suffice.

so i decided to take up smoking again! :? :lol: